Two weeks after I got back from my honeymoon, I did 3 woman team competition called TeamFit. I knew my priority would not be to really train much for this one but I looked at is as a last hurrah for the summer with my girls.  I also really like consistency. We thought of the chillest team name we could: Tea with Grandma. I think I felt so strung out with wedding stress that I wanted to have something following the wedding/honeymoon that felt familiar. See how skeptical of a person I am? (Hence, why I was blown away by the meaning I took away from my wedding ceremony). In moments of stress and change I always grasp for the familiar. The pain of repetitive thrusters is a familiar burn in my quads just like a heavy hang power clean consistently shows me a heave-ho pull in my traps. Training the physical body has always provided me with a calm and a familiar predictability. In high school and college, running was a way I calmed myself down and also a space in which I could work through emotion.

Three years ago, I competed in one of Proving Grounds first ever competitions at La Jolla high school on a 2 female/2 male team with some OG (original gangsta) Humanity members I continue to admire as athletes and friends to this day. And two years ago, our box, CrossFit Humanity, hosted the Proving Grounds first ever Stars and Bars. Since, then I must say I am super impressed at how far Proving Grounds has come.
At that first meet, way back when it was fairly confusing where we had to be when and there was so much time in between events. Due to the fact it was extremely hot that day, our team did the best we could to stay hydrated and learned the hard way that you need to bring your own shade to these outdoor competitions (not just a bottle of sunscreen). I remember the rig swaying when teams did their pull ups and us burning the skin off our hands and thighs as we went to do team burpees on the field made of re-purposed tire rubber. I was unsure of my abilities and motivated to not let me team down.
Stars and Bars was really exciting because it gave our little gym a lot of exposure. There were SO many competitors and spectators we were busting at the seams. Proving Grounds set up little barriers running parallel to the green so there was a spectator area and athletes competed on our platforms. Vendors and Athletes camped out in the back driveway under tents waiting for their time to warm up. I remember walking from the back driveway into the gym felt like entering a greenhouse. The humidity from the sweaty bodies felt like a hundred degrees and the smell in the air was RIPE. But we were so proud to be hosting no our own turf, it didn’t matter. Hitting the 95 lb snatch as the last movement of the final event was a highlight I’ll never forget.
The only constructive feedback I have for Proving Grounds at this last comp in Imperial Beach was a need for more consistency among the judges, regulations on who can enter what category, and steps for short people to get on the pull up rig. We had a fair judge, on overly strict judge and a checked out judge throughout the three events. It can be discouraging to see regional level athletes compete in the intermediate category just to sweep it and win cash money. If you’re a chick with a 12- pack warming up with 165 lb cleans I question why you’re in intermediate. Period. Lastly, us shortys had to expend a lot of extra energy output hoisting each other up cheerleader style to complete team pull ups. Would I recommend doing a Proving Grounds CrossFit competition? Absolutely! It’s a great way to test your metal and can really improve your skills if you train for it. If you don’t train for it, it’s a great way to reset and re-focus your training goals and a good way to get inspired by the athletic talent around you.

I’m back! My last post was in March and I realized how all consumed I’d been with wedding planning that I had not written a single thing since then. I didn’t even write drafts that go to the graveyard of unpublished. You’ll be happy to know, the wedding was more than I’d hoped it would be. After a year of planning, envisioning, communicating, pinning, tracking, and fitting, to see it all come together was movie magical. I consider myself a spiritual person but generally more a skeptic than a believer when it comes to all things romantic. If you had asked me what I would have predicted would be my favorite part of the wedding, I would have said the reception without missing a beat. Having gone through the experience, I was shocked to discover it was the ceremony that I loved the most.
I worked really hard on overcoming emotional baggage to be in a head space of joy, appreciation and gratitude. I found a great therapist and was working hard to separate issues with my father from spoiling a day I’d dreamed of my entire life. For all you daughters of fathers who have left you feeling disappointed and vulnerable your entire lives, you understand what a trip it can be to sort through emotional stress in the pressure cooker of wedding planning. I highly recommend putting in this kind of emotional work, because it helped calm my fears, trust my instincts and focus on the most important person that day, my husband.
When the trolley turned the corner and I saw him at the end of the aisle, any fear that I had that I was somehow marrying a man like my father just simply didn’t exist. The kindness in his eyes and the warmth of his smile made me feel like a tree rooting strongly into the ground. I was about to be a part of something other than just me in this world. I don’t remember walking down the aisle, it felt as if I was floating.

Friends and family asked me if Larry would be emotional and I said no way. He’s certainly a feeler but he’s not one to put emotion out in front of a lot of people. I felt guaranteed to have my rock up there. As I walked towards him I saw so much emotion on his face I lost it. I don’t know if I’ve ever experienced a moment as profoundly moving. The love was bigger than me, bigger than him, bigger than us. And for two pragmatic people, our worlds got rocked! Just a month later, I feel profoundly grateful I got to have such a life changing experience and overwhelmingly reassured that I chose wisely and he wanted to marry me too.