Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you’ve heard it, read it, been told a million times that in order to lead a healthy life, “It’s all about finding a balance.” As I strive to live my best life, something about hearing this ANNOYS me. If the word BALANCE were a big target in the sky, I’d want to shoot it down with a flaming arrow. What does it even mean??? I suppose it means take things in moderation? But here’s the truth about balance: It is as big of an illusion as the concept of PERFECTION. Striving for balance means aiming at a moving target and feeling like a failure if you’re not eating fields of kale and organic grass fed protein, and working out past the point of your body’s natural point of exhaustion. The advice also induces guilt, if you need a night off from busting your butt at the gym and enjoy multiple glasses of wine instead, why should you feel like a failure?

My natural body type is that of a cake pop and my beloved dog’s is that of an artisan loaf of bread. My husband is blessed with a lean genetic build and the ability to pause and feel full while eating. We’re hoping any future children get his blessed genes. Frankie, and I? Not so much. We don’t have an off switch receptor so we eat what’s in front of us until it’s gone. Just a cake pop and a bread loaf enjoying each meal side by side then finishing off what Larry leaves behind. Thankfully, Frankie, has the highest self esteem and absolutely zero body issues. Just one of the many perks of being a dog.

So my dog and I are NOT naturally thin creatures. That’s okay!  If I was, I would be lazier. Well, I’d be Frankie… Instead, vanity drives me to actively work against my cake pop body type whereas Frankie has fully given up on life. Instead of coveting someone else’s body, I’m learning how to love my own for it’s strength, speed and flexibility (for what my body can do). I’ve learned how to put a larger structure in place within my daily and weekly routines so I can maintain looking less like a cake pop and more like an 70% lean piece of solid beef. Thankfully, where my dog and I differ is I do love to exercise! It keeps my stress levels down and is a way of expressing myself. I enter a flow state when I exercise where nothing exists but my breath and the task at hand. My mind turns off, my body knows what to do, and I trust it to take me to the end.

Foods I have to regulate to keep me in check: White pasta, tortillas, tortilla chips and white rice, potato chips. I love me a good bowl of comfort carbs! Who doesn’t? I’m the lady at Chipotle who on a bad day, asks for a giant warmed tortilla on the side. Larry will see the foiled piece of lard love sitting next to my bowl, and know instantly, it’s been a bad day. So like any work of art, the jury is still out on what my actual health status is. But here are the most important boxes I know I’m checking off:

1) I have energy throughout my day

2) I have a general positive outlook on life

3) My body is fueled in a way that it can perform when put to the test

It’s easy to get swept up into health crazes and I admire those who can weigh their food and pre-plan what they are going to eat out at a restaurant. But for me, eating too rigidly, takes a lot of the joy out of eating, so instead I follow some very basic guidelines. They are my buoys in the storm of life which can be messy, complicated and stressful. When life stressors get too high and I’m being greeted on a first name basis at Chipotle, I know I need to get back to what I know works for me. Here are my health buoys:

• PLAN your weekly grocery list and try to add one new veggie side a week. I like to bake my veggies in olive oil and spices in the winter because it’s easy and delicious and I abhor salads when it’s cold out and I like to make fresh salads in the summer because it’s easy and delicious.

• COOK for yourself whenever you can and cook in excess! You’ll save money, eat better, and have the bonus of leftovers! I cook for myself even if my husband is gone. Non-negotiables for are protein, veggies, healthy fat and a carb that doesn’t make me feel bloated like sweet potatoes. Don’t forget about the leftovers you can freeze that still taste good defrosted a month later, like chili! YUM!

• LEFTOVERS for the win. If you cook well, you are guaranteed that your next day lunches will be just as nutritious. It’s a no brainer way to have healthy lunches throughout the work week.

• PARTY WATER. Make sure your urine is clear throughout the day and jazz up your water with cucumber slices, mint, or fresh squeezed lemon juice. I call it Party Water because that’s exactly what it is, dressed up, looking good, and smelling good. This water is ready for a good time and I have a better time drinking more of it when it’s jazzy.

• SLEEP. Not everyone can get the amount of sleep they need so just try and make sure the sleep you do get is quality sleep. We recently moved to a place with a pair of blackout shades and they have changed my sleep game. The quality of sleep I get is so much better. I wish I had known this earlier and I would’ve invested in a pair of black out shades sooner.

• EXERCISE.  Sports and exercise have always been in my life but I continue to evolve to do what speaks to me, what motivates me, and what I see myself wanting to get better at. Figure out what type of exercise speaks to you and MOVE DAILY. Some days it’s CrossFit other days it’s walking outside. Some days its yoga, other days its swimming, and sometimes it’s just walking the dog (against Frankie’s will of course). Your body tells you what it needs. Listen to it.

• Find the JOY in taste. For me, a good cheese, a good dark chocolate, a good glass of red wine, and a fresh donut are all worth living for. I try to remember they’re also meant to be tasted not inhaled. Try and make sure your treats are quality and you eat them without distraction. I eat my treats on my balcony away from the computer and TV. When there’s a screen in front of me, I don’t even know I’m eating!

• Say NO to junk in the house: Unless you have an insane amount of self-discipline, just don’t do it. If someone offered me dragon eggs, I wouldn’t take them because I know I can’t control a full-grown dragon. I know myself, and it’s the same with junk food. I get too weak and I work from home. Recent example, I made Larry banana bread. He left for a work trip for 3 days, came home and said banana bread was gone. He said, “You ate that banana bread in 3 days?!?” I lied saying, NO, blamed it on the dog, then admitted, YES, and added that that I had extended the poor banana bread’s due date by eating it in three days instead of one. He shook his head and I smiled.

That’s about it. I like the routines my structure give me during my week and the way I feel when I keep up with them. Am I balanced? Hardly. When I get so far off the beaten path, I begin to question my identity, I find my buoys (The above mentioned routines, if you’ve been sleeping through this post). It’s okay to get out of routine so long as you get back into it. You haven’t fallen off any wagon and no one is judging you. Don’t beat yourself up, just find your buoys. And once you’re back to rocking your weekly health routines I challenge you to add in one more layer. Start to get in touch with your body’s intuition by asking yourself:

• What does my body need today?
• What does my mind/intellect need today?
• What does my spirit need today?

By answering these questions you’re taking your basic foundation (the healthy routines you do weekly) and customizing it to your own needs. Feeling good in your body is worth working for. It helps you maintain a positive outlook on life, provides you with increased physical energy and confidence, and it brings you one step closer to the place we all truly long to be, the land of self-acceptance.