Beginning Yoga (Again)

yoga mat on rug with puppy

My yoga mat

Here’s the thing about me and fitness goals: They don’t stick unless I find the joy in them. I love long distance running because it calms me down, I love triathlons because they start with a swim and nothing makes me happier than being in the water, I love CrossFit because I’m continually challenged by a grab bag of movements, and I love power lifting because of the confidence it gives me and the immediate satisfaction I feel with every lift.

For years, I’ve been doing yoga on and off because when I moved to San Diego everyone was doing it and I can never stick with it. I love to lift heavy weights and I recognize if I want to continue to grow and benefit my sport I need to spend time on flexibility. I’ve been pondering why my experience “trying” yoga again and again has led me to think I dislike it? Is it because I didn’t identify with with crowd it attracted? Is it because I feel too ADD to every truly relax? Is it because I didn’t want to be packed into another room with other peoples smells too close to me? Or is it because I wasn’t ready to be open to getting in touch with myself on a deeper level?

Hesitant to set myself up for failure by setting a goal doing yoga x days per week, I started with a visual cue. I unrolled my yoga mat on my bedroom floor. Initially I did it as a reminder to do yoga. But my behavior upon seeing it before I went to bed and first thing when I woke up was interesting. At first, I stepped around it to get to my dresser or closet getting dressed in the morning. Then one night I thought: Why does my mat out mean I have to hold a pose that’s difficult for me? One night I went in and laid on my back in shavasana pose with the bottoms of my feet touching together and just tried to relax. “What are you doing, Hannah? This isn’t even yoga,” I told myself on night one. Now it’s been three weeks and I am looking forward to my nightly shavasana. It is my baby step towards meditation/self awareness. I strongly believe it has increased my creativity and I come out of it almost high that for a few minutes each day I get to exist somewhere between dreams and reality.

tricep stretch yoga class

Saturday Yoga at Humanity

My next step is trying to make a point to attend CrossFit Humanity’s Saturday yoga session. Katie Dunn is excellent at what she does and is her authentic dog loving self instead of trying to be some uber zen yoga faker. Yoga is difficult and humbling. I’m continuing to use my mat to build awareness with myself and who knows maybe one of these days I’ll feel the pull to start doing poses on my own.

 

Becoming a Flexible Bride

Each night before bed I sit on my yoga mat in the corner of my bedroom and well, I don’t do yoga. I close my eyes and visualize goals. Most recently I’ve been visualizing a lot about my wedding. Having to make a series of big decisions at once has never really been an issue for me but flexibility with a vision has. I’ll admit it’s not easy to veer from an idea of what I want my wedding to look like. The inspirational pictures and web links I’ve saved are like old friends who I’m suddenly disinviting from making their appearance on the big day. Here are a few initial surprise I’ve felt in the planning process thus far:

Surprise #1: I’ve been engaged for almost 2 months and I made some serious moves with my mom and Nai Nai to get a popular venue I’ve had my eye on that I also know books out at least a year in advance. Of course I already had pretty set idea on what colors I envisioned (black, white, gold and fuchsia) but when I saw the space in person the color scheme of the room would clash. I thought about bouncing to a more formal space I thought I wanted black and white with pops of hot pink. The space I chose has natural wood and earth colors (picture the lobby of an earth friendly hotel in Boulder, CO). “YES, I am a flexible bride.” Okay, so lighter colored linens and flowers to lighten up the space it is. And yet I mourned the loss of my loud and proud color friends.

black and white table

Surprise # 2: After locking in the venue I veered right off Wedding Planning List my Maid of Honor sent me and put down my credit card for a dress on a browsing session: first store, first dress I tried on. I thought I wanted more of a bombshell look and I ended up falling in love with a dress far more traditional. Thinking about it now, I wonder if I’ll regret the purchase by next year? What I love the most about my dress is the way I feel when I’m in it. I feel like a more beautiful version of myself.

sofia-vergara-white-dress-emmys-2014-h724

Surprise #3: I had no idea it takes six plus months to order and make a wedding dress. Who’s makes these dresses? Tiny little elves spinning white thread out of gold? I assumed all sizes were stocked in the back and I’d stroll out of there with new found prize in hand. Another thing that surprised me dress shopping was the silhouette I chose was not what I envisioned at all. I’d saved all of these pictures of a particular silhouette but when I tried this style on I just didn’t feel like me.

Action Steps:

1) I’ve learned to let go of an overly specific wedding vision. So what if my venue isn’t complimentary with fuchsia, black and white? The bigger question was what was the feeling these colors give me? By adjusting my thinking to choosing floral in a space that still creates elegance but isn’t stuffy helped me to not lose my $%#& completely.

2) If you ARE losing your $%#& completely (visibly or internalizing it) over a particular detail clearly it is important to you.  I’d had to choose between original color ideas or venue. If I felt inner turmoil at letting my original colors go I probably would’ve walked from the venue and found a more modern space that fit a more modern color scheme.

3) Be open to trying all types of wedding gowns even if you only save pictures and daydream about one particular silhouette. Be open minded and look for the dress that makes you feel like a more beautiful version of YOU. Not you trying to be Sophia Vergara.

What is Mobility, Anyway?

In the beginning I was hyper-focused on training. How can I be consistent with my training and how can I continue to push myself to the next level. I’m good at pushing myself and unfortunately I did some pretty crazy stuff and am lucky I haven’t sustained any serious injuries. In college, I would party all night and jump in a 10k run still drunk and dehydrated and run the entire race. In my mid-twenties in San Diego a fair number of my long distance training runs were hung over as I was insistent on living it up Friday and Saturday night EVERY weekend. At twenty-nine it was like the fifth gear in my engine gave out. If I wanted to improve I’d have to start changing my lifestyle. What I didn’t understand is that coming out of the invincible twenties decade I can no longer neglect my body and expect it to perform. Mobility is a big part of how I care for my body so it will continue to meet strength training demands.

I thought mobility was stretching. Stretching was what we did in gym class before the mile run. We sat on our bums with both legs straight out in front of us until we felt an uncomfortable pull in the backs of our legs hold for 10 seconds then move on. I learned that mobility was a newer school of thought from Kelly Starrett of San Francisco CrossFit and MobilityWOD. He describes it as, “a movement-based integrated full body approach that addresses all elements that limit movement performance including short and tight muscles, soft tissue restriction, joint capsule restriction, motor control problems, joint range of motion dysfunction, and neural dynamic issues. In short, mobilization is a tool to globally address movement and performance problems.”

The simple way I began thinking about this was adding movement to “stretching.” Like in these banded good mornings where you hinge at the hip with legs as straight as possible (without locking out the knees). It works you posterior chain and can be incorporated into a warm up or cool down.

banded good mornings

Photo Credit: Sal Ocampo/CrossFit Humanity

Finding a mobility routine has shown me the benefit of 3 tools: the roller, the lacrosse ball and the resistance band. If you want to see some of my favorites download the free app MoveWell and it has a nice little timer feature to ensure you spend ample time on each side. Also, if you’re at all physically active, invest in a roller, lacrosse ball and band. They will soon become your best friends and are easily packable for travel.

Action Steps:

1. What are some ways you can be gentler on your body? You only get one, folks.

2. Think about health and fitness as a lifelong goal. I want to be active well into my eighties.

3.  If you love training hard how can you care for yourself to gain top performance?